Redskins Vs. Politics

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A review by Bill Thompson, the notorious psycho

The 2011 Washington Redskins season is shockingly, more painful to watch than my foot.  I mean how much more could a football season possibly screw up?  The Redskins have made more media mistakes than Rick Perry:  They rotate two terrible quarterbacks, get suspended for violating the NFL’s drug policy, and they..uh…umm..what was the third one again?  Oh geeze. 

Anyway, the Redskins are sappier than the movie Ghost and more embarrassing and disturbing than any one of the Housewives on those dumb, uninspiring shows on Bravo I used to watch in my mid forties. 

Screw Housewives, Top Chef all the wa- so back to this analysis. 

It actually appears that the Redskins can accurately be compared to politics.  Trent Williams gets called for holding men too many times just like Cerman Hain holds too many women…aha. 

Thank you for that joke - Joe Biden! 

No really, it’s true; Herman Cain has been accused of sexual harassment several times.  He’s had a very bad history with the ladies.  I mean who is this guy, Tiger Woods? Heh, did you get that joke?  See because Tiger Woods is also black.

And how bout Pon Raul.  The guy reminds me of Shanahan in that they both constantly look like they’re smelling a really bad fart.  I mean they never smile.

See the resemblance.  Does something stink?  IS THAT MY FOOT?

Let’s not forget my man Rick Santorum, or as I prefer it, Dick Sandybum.  I don’t really know what Redskin to compare him with but you get the idea.  Redskins = Republican Presidential candidates.  They’re all dumb, not fun, pathetic, flat out wet blanket people. 

Oh wait, I just described my son...well maybe he can stop calling the cops on me.  Heck, I already got four allegations on my gluteus maximus.  I really hope the police don’t catch me.  It took me four years to plan my escape from prison. 

Have I said too much yet?  Is that the stench of my foot?  Are you getting sick of that joke yet?  Ugh, I have more unanswered questions than the Redskins have to fill for next season.  Subscribe to me at TopChef.com for more reviews about anything I feel like writing about.  My account is under the name “chefpsycho56.” 

Alright yall, peace homies.